• I'll give you something to cry about
  
• Because I said so
  
• Go the f*ck to sleep
  
• I will turn this car around
• Don't make me count to three
  

Feel like parenting has turned your wit into diaper jokes? Parenting Pens are the adult gag gift designed to restore your sense of humor. Perfect for white elephant exchanges or a Secret Santa at the office where parenting woes are the real prank. Finally, a funny gift that’s as hilarious as you once were, pre-kids.